7 Dreamcatchers We’ll Just Sell With The House

By David Colton

  1. The Dreamcatcher You Got As A Gift From That Weird Philosophy Professor
When he gave it to you, he said “It’s funny, you know. This dreamcatcher has already felt your energy. Your presence in dreams is a familiar feeling to this dreamcatcher.” He didn’t really ever wash his ponytail but he did know how to pick out a good dreamcatcher. We could probably get $15.

2. The Dreamcatcher We Found in Kristin Chenoweth’s Garbage

Kristin thought she could get away with throwing out this perfectly functional dreamcatcher. Not today, ma’am! All that’s left to do is decide whether or not to bill it as Kristin Chenoweth’s dreamcatcher when we give tours of the house.

3. ‘Dreamcatcher’ (2003) (Chinese Version)

Buckle up, folks. This dreamcatcher is a little bit different from the rest. Complete with a damaged DVD case and endless hours of title screen music, This dreamcatcher could end up selling for more than the house itself.

4. The-Dream Catcher

5. The Dreamcatcher That Caught My Most Intense Sex Dream Of All Time

He looks even more raw and vulnerable than I remember him. One can only imagine how much a lucky child would pay for this. Now we just need to find a kid who is looking to put down $300-400k on a house in a neighborhood with good schools!

6. “The Howl”

Some people might say that a dreamcatcher on a poster doesn’t count, but that’s just not true. I happily paid $85 for this poster and when we list it with the house, I’ll probably list it as an additional 3 or 4 grand. That is, once we move it to the bathroom and fake two pawprint signatures in the bottom right corner.

7. The Dreamcatcher That The Lady Said Will Make Dad Come Back

When the lady with the funny car came and asked where Dad is she gave us this. She said if my Dad comes home I should go down in the room with the wine in the basement and lock the door. I wonder if Dad will show up at the house when somebody else lives in it.

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