By Mo Macsai-Goren
TULSA – Local toddler Teddy Montgomery turned heads Thursday afternoon after dropping a hot, stinky McDeuce in the Playplace™ ball pit at the McDonald’s near Exit 42. Resulting in the immediate closure of the play complex, Montgomery’s actions struck a familiar chord with locals.
“Oh, we get this all the time,” regular Chuck Tumbers said. “Last week we had three toddlers defecate in the transition tube between the balance beam and the mesh-zone™. We’re used to the fumes. At this point, they almost compliment the meat. ”
Tumbers seemed completely unphased by the incident as he downed two fillet-o-fish™ in direct proximity of the Playplace™.
“Teddy will be grounded immediately,” Martha Montgomery told Gatekeeper reporters. “He hasn’t had an accident at home in six months…he must want to poop in the ball pit. His therapist Dr. Shoil says its because that’s where he feels the safest.”
The Exit 42 McDonald’s crew cleaned up the accident in record time and sanitized every ball before reopening the Playplace complex.
While unavailable for comment, Teddy’s legal team released a public apology while simultaneously outlining his plans to almost definitely do it again next Wednesday.