By Mo Macsai-Goren

BOISE, ID – Ensuring that he would never see the washed out, triple-exposure pictures from his most recent road trip through Yellowstone, local river raft instructor Brett Cyders made sure to pick up a disposable camera or two before leaving town. Sources close to Cyders have expressed their disappointment with the 29-year-old full-time camp counselor, claiming that he has never once developed the film from the countless cameras he has picked up over the years.

Cancun. Ft. Lauderdale. Minneapolis. Lithuania. These are just a few of the places Cyders has immortalized on film and then immediately forgotten about because he refuses to get a digital camera.

Family weddings? Birthdays? When that guy at the resort puts a lizard on you and then asks for money for a picture of you with his lizard? All lifelong milestones that will disappear with Cyders. The only solution? Develop the rolls and rolls of film sitting hidden under the milk crate full of tapestries he keeps sitting shotgun in his RV.

“You just can’t beat the warmth and grain of film. It’s just not the same,” Cyders said. “I took Photo 1 like, eight years ago in college and it’s just stuck with me since. I can’t go back to digital. It’s an artistic nightmare.”

Cyders then added that he is on his fifth consecutive gap year but plans on taking Photo 2 as soon as he gets back to campus.