Old Phone Announces Permanent Residency in Top Dresser Drawer
Guy Who Chose Not to Order Anything Wondering if You’re Going to Finish That
Bruce Springsteen to Release First New Album in Five Minutes
Area Man Can’t Quite Put Rash Into Words
Instagram Poll Voted on in Attempt to Skip Past Instagram Poll
Lamest Friends at Apartment Party Exiled to Balcony
Scheduling Disaster: Coachella Accidentally Booked Every Act to Play at Same Time
Oh Shit: Good Charlotte Just Tweeted Proof That Good Friday Was Named After Them
The Gatekeeper 